It was a crazy day today and I feel a sense of days to come. We had to get up early (for us) to get Tucker, my parents' dog (one of them) to the vet. After that we stopped at Meijer (where I forgot, again, to buy white sugar). I remembered partway through Meijer that Bekah had a make-up class for dance. So we hurried home and then off to dance class.
What I want to talk about, though, is something I heard on The Colbert Report. Brian and I are huge fans of the Daily Show and Colbert Report. We find we can get a sense of what's really going on if we watch these shows.
One of the reasons I love these shows is because they have a lot of authors as guests. We are behind a few months, so the one we watched featured an author named Andrew Solomon. His book, Far From the Tree: Parents, Children and the Search for Identity.
It's really a book about people who have kids who are completely not like them, in good and bad ways. He calls them exceptional and that is the best way I can describe Jeremy. He is exceptional. He was an expected child but we weren't really expecting what we ended up with.
Mr. Solomon described it this way--it's like you spend 40 weeks preparing to go to Italy. You buy the tickets, you learn the language, you study the culture, etc. Then, while you're on the airplane, the pilot comes on the PA and announces that you're actually traveling to Holland.
It's quite a shock, to be preparing for parenting a kid that's like the ones you read about in books, only to find out that he's about as different as you can get from that.
The idea of landing in a country other than the one for which you prepared can be jarring. The thing is, Holland is also quite beautiful. It has tulips and windmills and Rembrandt. Being Jeremy's parent has been like that for me. I landed in Holland kicking and screaming because it was so different than what I had expected. Now, since we have had a diagnosis and treatment plan, I'm starting to appreciate the different scenery.
Jeremy will start kindergarten in a few days. I have been awash in anxiety about a hundred different things. It's overwhelming and I spent most of last night in tears. I know he's going to the best school, has the best teachers, best support staff, best principal. I know God has a plan for him. I know all of these things. I trust the system, I know I don't know everything.
But he is my little Dutch boy. How can I explain him adequately to his kindergarten teacher? How will I tell her that he hates group singing and loud noises, but talks loudly himself? I'm afraid if I try to give too much information that I'll be the "crazy" mom. I am fairly certain that each room gets one and it's the early-crazy-bird-gets-the-room mentality.
We are dropping off supplies tomorrow and I'm really at a Los about what, if anything, I should say to her. Hum. Maybe I'll stay up until 2 AM worrying about it. That's probably the most direct route to a solution.
Or maybe praying. Maybe that's the best one.
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